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雅思寫(xiě)作短小精煉,成都華櫻外語(yǔ)來(lái)幫忙
雅思寫(xiě)作短小精煉,成都華櫻外語(yǔ)來(lái)幫忙
92 2017-06-24
建議一:避免空洞的單詞和詞組
1.一些空洞的單詞或詞組根本不能為句子帶來(lái)任何相關(guān)或重要的信息,完全可以刪掉。例如:Whenallthingsareconsidered,youngadultsoftodaylivemoresatisfyinglivesthanthoseoftheirparents,inmyopinion.這句話(huà)當(dāng)中的“whenallthingsareconsidered”和“inmyopinion“都顯得多余。完全可以去掉。改為:Youngadultsoftodaylivemoresatisfyinglivesthantheirparents.
2.有些空洞和繁瑣的表達(dá)方式可以進(jìn)行替換。例如:Duetothefactthatourgrandparentswereunderanobligationtohelptheirparents,theydidnothavetheoptionsthatyoungpeoplehaveatthispointintime.“duetothefactthat”就是一個(gè)很典型的繁瑣的表達(dá)方式的例子,可以替換,簡(jiǎn)化為下面的表達(dá)方式:Becauseourgrandparentswereobligatedtohelptheirparents,theydidnothavetheoptionsthatyoungpeoplehave
now.
建議二:避免重復(fù)
1.盡量避免重復(fù)使用同樣的詞匯?;蛘哂械臅r(shí)候雖然詞匯沒(méi)有重復(fù),但意思卻有重復(fù)。這時(shí)候可以做一些簡(jiǎn)化的工作。例如:Thefarmmygrandfathergrewuponwaslargeinsize.large對(duì)一個(gè)farm來(lái)說(shuō)就是size方面的large,所以insize可以去掉,改為:Thefarmmygrandfathergrewuponwaslarge.更簡(jiǎn)潔的表達(dá)方式為:Mygrandfathergrewuponalargefarm.
2.有時(shí)一個(gè)詞組可以用一個(gè)更簡(jiǎn)單的單詞來(lái)替換。例如:Mygrandfatherhassaidoverandoveragainthathehadtoworkonhisparents'farm.這里的overandoveragain就可以改為repeatedly,顯得更為簡(jiǎn)潔:Mygrandfatherhassaidrepeatedlythathehadtoworkonhisparents'farm.
建議三:選擇最恰當(dāng)?shù)恼Z(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)。選擇合適的語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)可以使句子的表達(dá)更為精確和簡(jiǎn)練。雖然語(yǔ)法的多樣性也很重要,但選擇最恰當(dāng)?shù)恼Z(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)仍然是更為重要的考慮因素。
1.一個(gè)句子的主語(yǔ)和謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞應(yīng)該能夠反映句子中最重要的意思。例如:Thesituationthatresultedinmygrandfather'snotbeingabletostudyengineeringwasthathisfatherneededhelponthefarm.從意思上來(lái)分析,上面這句話(huà)需要表達(dá)的重要的概念是“grandfather'snotbeingabletostudy”,而在表達(dá)這個(gè)概念時(shí),原句用的主語(yǔ)是situation,謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞是was,不能強(qiáng)調(diào)需要表達(dá)的重點(diǎn)概念,可以改為下面這句話(huà):Mygrandfathercouldn'tstudyengineeringbecausehisfatherneededhelponthefarm.
2.避免頻繁使用“therebe”結(jié)構(gòu)。例如:Therewere25cowsonthefarmthatmygrandfatherhadtomilkeveryday.Itwashardworkformygrandfather.可以改為:Mygrandfatherworkedhard.Hehadtomilk25cowsonthefarmeveryday.更簡(jiǎn)潔的句式為:Mygrandfatherworkedhardmilking25cowsdaily.
3.把從句改為短語(yǔ)或單詞。例如:Dairycowswereraisedonthefarm,whichwaslocated100kilometersfromthenearestuniversityandwasinanareathatwasremote.
更簡(jiǎn)介的表達(dá):Thedairyfarmwaslocatedinaremotearea,100kilometerstothenearestuniversity.
4.僅在需要強(qiáng)調(diào)賓語(yǔ)而不是主語(yǔ)的時(shí)候,才使用被動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài)。例如:Inthefall,notonlydidthecowshavetobemilked,butalsothehaywasmowedandstackedbymygrandfather'sfamily.這句話(huà)的重心應(yīng)該是“忙碌的家mygrandfather'sfamily”,而使用了被動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài)后,重心變成了cows和hay。下面的表達(dá)方式是主動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài),相對(duì)來(lái)說(shuō)更簡(jiǎn)潔一些:Inthefall,mygrandfather'sfamilynotonlymilkedthecowbutalsomowedandstackedthehay.
5.用更為精確的一個(gè)動(dòng)詞來(lái)代替動(dòng)詞短語(yǔ)。例如:Mygrandfatherdidn'thavetimetostandarounddoingnothingwithhisschoolfriends.Standarounddoingnothing完全可以用一個(gè)動(dòng)詞表達(dá),即loiter:Mygrandfatherdidn'thavetimetoloiterwithhisschoolfriends.
6.有時(shí)兩句話(huà)的信息經(jīng)過(guò)組合完全可以用一句話(huà)來(lái)簡(jiǎn)練地表達(dá)。例如:Profitsfromthefarmwerenotlarge.Sometimestheyweretoosmalltomeettheexpensesofrunningafarm.Theywerenotsufficienttopayforauniversitydegree.兩句話(huà)的信息可以合并為一句:Profitsfromthefarmweresometimestoosmalltomeetoperationalexpenses,letalonepayforauniversitydegree.
希望以上幾點(diǎn)建議能讓成都雅思培訓(xùn)的烤鴨們不斷提高句法、內(nèi)容的完整度和準(zhǔn)確性,使自己的文章更加短小精煉,在雅思寫(xiě)作上取得理想的成績(jī)。
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